31.12.08

Inevitable


One of my most unfavorite things is being apart. Being apart from my friends, my families, my relatives, whoever, important or not, they definitely own a part of my life. Haven't you felt like missing someone you never thought that you would miss them bad? And when you look back, there's no other turn. At this kind of situation, some sayings would fit perfectly. "Regrets always come later" or "You will never find out how important something until the moment you lose it". They sound wise, no good, and-bitter.

And now, to ever experience it is even worse. I don't own enough capability to spoil them into words, the feelings were in and then out, sometimes there, existing, and with one accord, poww! Just as being under spell,they were gone-vanishing-completely. How will I be able to survive, I do not know. From where I will obtain the power, I'm also curious to know.

What I was trying to say, maybe would not be clear enough to say. What I will be through fom now will be a brave and uncertain step. I completely run out of imagination, what would I be? What I had been before hardly would be what I'll have been. I tried to be the same but change is an undeniable choice. Changes are not something to be afraid of, instead it is a good chance to improve yourself. But I'm one of the people who have not prepared much for it.

Like a spoilt brat, I couldn't help crying missing my best friends. I know they are not to be replaced but the thing is I have to do so. "Get Wiser" has always been written on my friends' birthday cards I handed to them, but even pieces of those two words never seemed to reflect my attitude and behavior.

About being apart, being separated, it commonly happened to people around us. But to yourself, it does not feel so right, so good. Uneasy, that sort of feelings happened to appear everytime I wondered about Jakarta. I always wonder why

5 comments:

  1. Man kok lo pindah sih?? gak bilang bilang lagi.... man sedih man pasti bakal kangen banget ngejayus bareng... untung foto foto alay nya masih ada!! i love you man!!!

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  2. manda manda manda sungguh kutanya mengapa oh mengapa kau pindah ? kita kan mau fg.. aku membutuhkan kelakuanmu sehari-hari seperti biasa,jayusanmu haa..cepat pulang ya sayang, we'll be missing you so fuckin much ;(

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  3. i watched this, quite inspiring :-)

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  4. ah, thank you so much Debra : )

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  5. pica sendi, gue akan pulang secepatnya, tunggu yaaaaaaaa huhuhu

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