better than love

the nap i just had was perhaps one of the deepest slumbers i had ever let my body dive into this past week

feeling tired without reason

i woke up imperceptibly, my back glued to my bedsheets while i tried gaining back my consciousness, it was a hot day, fierce weather as usual, the sunlight managed to get filtered through the glass windows i'd deliberately covered with tinted papers. raindrops invaded the stark grey surface of the roads earlier and the pavement i subsequently walked over, sending my mom to the nearest private clinic. the queue was long, people were standing outside the room because there were no more seats left.

the only thing i wanted after waking up was a nice bath, with some sweet scent, not sugar sweet but wilderness sweet, something rather impromptu instead of rehearsed..

so i lit some cranberry and two other types of wildberry-scented candles my mom picked at ikea

upstairs i tried to run the water and looked for the rubber stopper and failed to find it anywhere. i called mom and she said that we never had it ever since we moved here three months ago

so i went on and decided to use the sink stopper, which of course didn't fit. i tried to put a lime green bucket above it to prevent the water from going down the drain

it seemed to work at first. the tub was a quarter full with water, into which i poured some cranberry shower gel. i quickly leaped into it, feeling exalted yet calm after immersing half my body in the unmoving water. i brought myself to a temporary state of natural high, surrounded with nice smells and featherweight foam in a dimly lit room

inhaled, exhaled

"every second is a lifetime"

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